Crisis Averted

I started the pre-flight checklist on (did we ever officially name this?) Battlestar Redneckia. I've been working on the interior off and on the past several months, but I haven't touched the engine because it ran like a top the last trip to TMS. Maybe I should have paid a little more attention to the old girl.

After charging the battery, checking fluids, ect., I hopped in and turned the key. It's always been a bit quirky starting after sitting for a while. The old Quadrajet carbs are notorious about leaking the float bowl dry of gas if they sit for an extended period of time, so there is a ritual you must follow:

1. Spin the starter for 10 seconds without touching the gas pedal to fill the empty float bowl.
2. Pump the gas pedal to the floor 3 times to squirt gas into the carb.
3. Spin the starter without touching the gas pedal.

If you follow these 3 simple rules the 350 Chevy engine will spring to life without fail. Except for last night...

It would not start even if my life depended on it. This was not good. I only had 1 day left before I had to hit the road. The campground was already paid for and I did not have a backup plan. I sat there thinking about all the things that could be wrong and decided it was time to go back to my shadetree mechanic roots. I had duct tape and bailing wire on standby if things got serious.

For this next part I guess I should issue a disclaimer from The South 40 Legal Department: Kids, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! That is unless you (think you) know what you're doing. I took my faithful old glass Coke bottle and filled it with gas. Then I removed the interior engine cover. It's built on a C30 van frame so it has the hump inside the cab next to the driver. Then I removed the air cleaner and dribbled some gas directly into the carb. I hit the key and it sprang to life for a second or two then died. I repeated the process a few times which should have been enough  for the fuel pump to suck gas out of the tank and into the carb. It didn't.

Now I knew the problem was fuel and not electrical. That was a good thing since electrical problems are a whole 'nother can of worms to deal with. Now I had 3 potential problems to diagnose. Bad fuel pump, clogged fuel filter or an empty fuel tank. Bad fuel pump was the worst case scenario and I was praying that wasn't the case. I'm sure that parts for a 1978 engine are getting hard to find or at least would have to wait for  one to be shipped. I didn't have the time to wait on a shipped part.

So I broke out the trusty Metrinch tool kit. If you don't have one of these, get one. It's the best tool kit I've ever owned. It fits metric and SAE with the same wrench or socket and it will not round off a nut or bolt head. It has never let me down when I needed it most. But, I digress.

I decided to remove the gas line from the carb and see if it was getting fuel that far. As I turned the pipenut I discovered to my horror that the metal fuel line was twisting along with the nut. NOT GOOD!!!! I said a prayer to Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration and turned the nut back the opposite direction and the line bent back into somewhat the same shape as it was before. I came to the conclusion not to do that again.

Next I crawled under the engine and removed the fuel lines from the pump. I should have been showered in gas, but they were both (feed and return) bone dry. I had just enough slack in them that I could get my lips around them and gave a good blow. There was little restriction in either, but I could hear bubbling in the gas tank, a promising sound. I reconnected the fuel lines, dribbled a little gas in the carb and hit the key.

There's nothing quite as sweet as the sound of an engine purring after you've been sweating getting it running again.